Ciao For Now

Today, i made a choice. A hard, heartbreaking, bittersweet choice. It wasn't easy, it wasn't hard. it was just a decision, emotions aside, i had to do what i've learn to do best- look out for myself. I am forever grateful to the one person who made me dig deep and start caring, supporting and thinking for myself. They will always be remembered as the person who taught me some of my biggest life lessons, and they will never even know it. I am on my own this time, no comforting ties, no comforting furniture to remind me of memories and days of laughter and days of sadness. I am leaving behind a part of town that helped me grow in ways I can't even explain. A city I really never took advantage of. I saw today what i thought were "greener pastures" and I realized i actually had the greener side all along, ironic huh? but that is my life, always surprising, always exciting and always always always ironic. I can't run from it so i am embracing it. I will be leaving behind: memories.  

good, and bad. Old apartments that i consider places i "grew up". People, that i wouldn't necessarily consider my

self to hang out with, but def. enjoyed. Bars, pictures, scenery, moments in time.

The woman I have grown into, the adult that i am is astonishing considering where i started. I am amazed more and more each day of the world around me, and i am more and more aware of how blessed i truly am. The world is fruitful and delicious. 

I cannot believe that this truly is, the end. The end. It feels as real as the city i live in. I am moving forward, I am not thinking of my insecurities, I am not thinking about what the future has in store for me, because i found that planning life is such a waste of time, because the surprises are so much more fun. If you told me 2 years ago that i would be here, i wouldn't of believed it. I can't believe i am. I am trying to wrap my head around all of these thoughts. I almost said emotions but like i said, i have to leave emotions out of the equations. It's time to 

be serious. business. school. life. 

I get to discover a whole new world. I get to experience what i've wanted for so long. It's def. frightening. But something tells me, i way more equipped to handle this than I orignally thought. 

Ciao B.H., good bye WestSide, so long old friend, hello new ones. Goodbye struggle, hello freedom. 

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